Dear Diary, I Think My Life Sucks
by espeon16
Summary: Basically Hitsugaya's thoughts on high school as he tries to survive the year. Please R & R. Plot/pairings upon request and vetting. AU.
1. Chapter 1

New fanfic.

Just to warn you first: this has nothing to do with the shinigami dimension. Don't like don't read!

Of course, if you like it please review!

Author's note: By 'Plot/pairings upon request and vetting', I mean that if you would like to see a particular pairing or event happen, you can request it through review, or you can PM me. For pairings, I will NOT accept yaoi/yuri. Any other pairings can work, but only if more than 1 person requests it.

Another author's note: This is based on the school system in my country, since I don't know how an actual high school works. If you have any confusion with any terms whatsoever, just PM me.

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**5 Jan, ****before Assembly, Classroom 2-2 (Form class)**

The start of a new school year. New books, new class, new classmates.

You'd think I'd be thrilled.

'Thrilled' is an overstatement.

I mean, from what Yumichika told me, I'm the only one in a different class. The rest of class 1-1 has made it to class 2-1.

They get Ukitake-sensei! This is SO unfair. Apparently, Ukitake-sensei always lets his form class eat in class, play games during his lessons, etc. He even bakes cookies for them!

Why can't I get a form teacher like that?

No, no fun form teachers for me.

My form teacher is Kyouraku-sensei.

He appears to be a kind, bumbling man at first sight.

Do not be fooled. He wears PINK.

What self-respecting man wears PINK?

Not to mention that he boozes from noon all the way to midnight.

Hopefully he doesn't teach any of my afternoon classes.


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer that stretches across all chapters: I don't own Bleach.

Author's note: You know in the previous chapter when I said plot upon request? I've thought it through, and decided that crossovers can be considered too.

Remember, please review!

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**5 Jan, Geog, Classroom 2-2**

Okay, so I know I'm not supposed to be writing in my journal during lesson.

But it's not like anyone cares, right?

Anyway, the teachers are just introducing themselves today.

So, aside from Kyouraku-sensei (who has expressly insisted that we call him Shunsui), I've got pretty decent teachers.

Here:

Language Arts (English and Lit) – Byakuya-sensei (darn!)

PE – Kenpachi-sensei

Math – Ukitake-sensei

Chem – Mayuri-sensei

Bio – Urahara-sensei

Geog – Kyouraku-sensei

History (urgh!) – Nemu-sensei

Health Ed (who needs health ed anyway? It's all just common sense.) – Unohana-sensei

Social studies (boring) – Aizen-sensei

Art – Yoruichi-sensei

Music – Gin-sensei

I guess the lineup of teachers is all right. If only my classmates were as satisfactory.

Such a tragedy, really.

CLASS 2-1 2009 (Class List)

Form teacher: Kyouraku Shunsui

Co-form teacher: Shihouin Yoruichi

Kurosaki Ichigo

Hitsugaya Toshirou

Madarame Ikkaku

Abarai Renji

Matsumoto Rangiku

Ulquiorra Schiffer

Kuchiki Rukia

Koetsu Isane

Koetsu Kiyone

Marechiyo Oomaeda

Ishida Uryuu

Pathetic, isn't it?

2-1 '09 is like, probably the SMALLEST class ever.

I think I can cope with Matsumoto, Ulquiorra keeps to himself anyway, Ishida is just obsessed with the sewing club, and the Koetsu twins are fine. Oomaeda spends all his time either eating rice crackers or thinking about rice crackers. Rukia is fine, I guess.

If not for Kurosaki and his gang, I might survive this year.

According to rumours, the Kurosaki gang was a band of delinquents who terrorized the teachers last year. Kyouraku-sensei was the only one they didn't dare to annoy. (they were probably scared off by all the booze talk.)

The entire Kurosaki gang (Kurosaki, Renji, Ikkaku) is in MY class this year.

Just perfect.

I think my life sucks.

Big time.

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Just a note: Yes, I included the espadas. They are cool, okay?

Review please!


	3. Chapter 3

Review review review!

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**9 Feb, History, Classroom 2-2**

Aizen-sensei is EVIL!

Just because I was opening my journal and taking out a pen, he just assumed that I was writing something unrelated to class (well, I was), he CONFISCATED it.

SO unfair.

Today, I shall write about the fire drills.

Fire drills SUCK. I know, it's all for being prepared and all, but HELLO, It's all common sense anyways. Besides, when there's a real fire, you aren't gonna stand there amidst all the panic and go "Kay, everyone line up, wait for the announcement and then go down xxx staircase and go to xxx and wait."

No. You will most probably run around like a headless chicken and accidentally run into the fire.

So, I conclude that fire drills are useless.

And what's with school toilets? I mean, you can get locked inside.

A few days ago we were returning from music when we heard faint whimpers from the male toilet.

"I'm…stuck…"

It seems that Byakuya-sensei was doing…erm…big business and then the cubicle, being evil, locked him in. He did get rescued, eventually. (Ishida couldn't bear the pathetic moaning.)

But it WAS kinda fun, listening to our prim and proper teacher moaning in the loo.

And it raises the question: What happens if you get locked in the toilet during a fire?

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Review!


	4. Chapter 4

**10 Feb, Reccess, Toilet**

Yeah, so I'm eating reccess today instead of stoning in the library.

Saw Kurosaki's sister today. We were all sitting together at the same table as a class, when she walked over to Kurosaki. When I first saw her, I couldn't believe that she was his SISTER. I mean, the face shape is the same, but whatever. I thought that there wasn't much resemblance to Kurosaki there. And then she opened her mouth.

"Hey, Ichi-nii, I didn't know you had an elementary schooler in your class."

I nearly choked on my watermelon.

"Nah, Karin. He's just short 'cuz he's been eating too many Oreos. Cornstarch stunts growth, you know."

And then I just blew up.

"I don't even LIKE Oreos!"

Kurosaki just smirked.

"How else would you express your lack of height then?"

By then, the entire canteen was staring at us.

I was just so PISSED, I just yelled, "I'm just short! Geddit?"

And then I stalked off to the toilet.

So now, here I am, hiding in a cubicle, trying to see whether it's possible to die of embarrassment. If I get locked in, all the better. Then I'll have excuse for skipping History.

Oh, great. I hear footsteps. Gotta go.


	5. Chapter 5

**10 Feb, Math, Classroom 2-2**

Turns out those footsteps were Ulquiorra. He'd come to find out where I'd gone and ended up in the loo. The following conversation ensued.

"Hitsugaya-san, get out of the loo now."

"No WAY!"

"History's over, you dolt. Nemu-sensei didn't even notice your absence too."

"Terrific. Now go away and leave me alone."

"It's Math now."

"So?"

"So Ukitake-sensei decided that today would be the perfect day for a pop quiz. He sent me to fetch you."

I was out of there in an instant. No way I was going to miss a pop quiz, even if I was so good at Math anyway that missing a test wouldn't affect my grades a lot.

It was an ALGEBRA test. Whee.

I finished it in 5 minutes, which is why I am now writing in my diary.

Yeah, so when I walked into class, the Kurosaki gang was like,

"Oi, chibi, you missed your favourite subject!"

I almost blew up again. They say that boring people like boring subjects (which explains our History teacher) but I am SO not boring. I mean, I know I'm in the Calligraphy Club, but whatever. Look at Ishida. President of the Sewing Club. Or Oomaeda, the founder and sole member of the I-Love-Rice-Crackers club. Then re-evaluate your idea of boring.

Seriously.

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Review as usual!

There is a poll on my profile, please go vote!


	6. Chapter 6

**13 Feb, Class Time, Classroom 2-2**

Friday the 13th! Woohoo!

Yeah, so I misplaced my journal for a few days. Lots of catching up to do.

Firstly, I am no longer allowed to write in my journal during lessons. Only during class time (now), when everyone is packing their bags and awaiting the dismissal bell. So while everyone is busy cramming stuff into their bags and jabbering away, I sit at my table and write. Not that it actually affects me. I pack my bag after every lesson anyways. The reason for me not being able to write my journal during class? Ukitake-sensei told me while I was writing in it during the Math test.

I am not allowed to write in my journal during class, or Aizen-sensei will confiscate it and use it to start a bonfire for the annual teacher's marshmallow cookout.

I'm not sure if he was being sarcastic.

Secondly, I finally got my revenge on Kurosaki. I caught a cockroach yesterday morning and chucked it under his desk. During the first period (History), Kurosaki reached under his desk to pull out his textbook. I think he felt the feelers, because he started yanking at something under his desk. A second later, the cockroach crawled onto the desk, and the entire Kurosaki gang stared at it and screamed.

Screamed.

Like a girl.

And then Nemu-sensei stared at them and the cockroach, and screamed too.

And then Kyouraku-sensei, who was teaching next door, popped his head in to see what the matter was. When he saw what was happening, he invited the entire of Class 2-1 over to watch. IOt's not everyday that you see three delinquents and a robot-like teacher jumping like kangaroos and screeching like banshees at the sight of a cockroach.

Cool, innit?


	7. Chapter 7

**16 Feb, Class Time, Classroom 2-2**

I know I shouldn't have expected Kurosaki to just leave the cockroach episode.

Though goodness knows how his puny little brain actually thought of a scheme like that.

Yeah, so as I was coming back from recess today, I noted that the door was only slightly ajar instead of wide open. Also, I heard whispers of "He's here!"

Suspicious, right?

Right.

So being cautious, I grabbed a broomstick and prodded the door open. A bucket of blue paint crashed down from the door and splatted on the floor in front of me.

"Oh crap! It missed him!"

Kurosaki's voice. Hmm, expected.

Then I walked in, and the unexpected happened.

Kurosaki had a back-up plan.

Paint bombs.

So about five seconds later, I stormed out of the classroom covered head to toe in splotches of black paint. Luckily, most of the paint managed to wash off, and Mom was paranoid enough to chuck me a spare uniform 'just in case you get dirty'.

My hair is STILL wet.

I seriously need revenge.

I'm thinking bubblegum.


	8. Chapter 8

**17 Feb, Geog, Classroom 2-2**

Ulquiorra: I can NOT believe you did that.

Hitsugaya: Did what?

U: That.

H: That's a very helpful hint, thank you very much.

U: You're welcome.

H: So.. whaddya mean by 'that'? The bubblegum thing?

U: Exactly.

H: Well, I just felt this sudden urge to do something more interesting with my gum, besides chucking it in the bin.

U: So you chucked it under Kurosaki-kun's table.

H: What's wrong with that? It's revenge for the paint thing.

Ishida: Oy, both of you. Stop passing notes.

H: You think I care?

I: No.

H, U: Exactly.

I: What are you talking about anyways? The gum thing?

H,U: Exactly.

H: I wish I had a camera to snap a picture/video of his FACE when he saw GUM on his fingers, stretching beneath the desk. Then I'd post it on the Internet.

I: You are such a SADIST.

H,U: Exactly.

I: Can you stop doing that? It's freaking me out.

H,U: Exactly why we are doing it.

I:He's looking this way.

H,U: Crap.

I will not pass notes in class.

I will not pass notes in class.

I will not pass notes in class.

I will not pass notes in class.

I will not pass notes in class.

I will not pass notes in class.

I will not pass notes in class.

I will not pass notes in class.

I will not pass notes in class.

I will not pass notes in class.

I will not pass notes in class.

I will not pass notes in class.

I will not pass notes in class.

I will not pass notes in class.

I will not pass notes in class.

I will not pass notes in class.

I will not pass notes in class.

I will not pass notes in class.

I will not pass notes in class.

I will not pass notes in class.

I will not pass notes in class.

I will not pass notes in class.

I will not pass notes in class.

I will not pass notes in class.

I will not pass notes in class.

I will not pass notes in class.

I will not pass notes in class.

I will not pass notes in class.

I will not pass notes in class.

I will not pass notes in class.

I will not pass notes in class.

I will not pass notes in class.

I will not pass notes in class.

I will not pass notes in class.

I will not pass notes in class.

I will not pass notes in class.

I will not pass notes in class.


	9. Chapter 9

**18 Feb, Class Time, Classroom 2-2**

Matsumoto is a VERY annoying person. VERY, VERY, VERY annoying.

You'd think that because Geog was last period, everyone would just go home and forget about it. I thought that too.

I thought wrong.

This morning, I walked into class to find this written on the chalkboard AND whiteboard in large capitals:

CHIBI-CHAN, CRYBABY-FACE, AND NERDY-SAN GOT INTO TROUBLE!

Rawr.

I was so PISSED, when I dumped my bag onto my chair, the chair fell backwards with the force.

Right on Matusumoto's foot. Serves her right. I KNOW she wrote that sentence on the board. It's her handwriting. No one else has such HORRIBLE scrawls. Not even Kurosaki.

So after I picked my chair up (and refused to say sorry to Matsumoto), she said:

"Don't look at me, it was all Kurosaki-kun's idea."

So they were in cahoots now, were they?

Or maybe not. Since Kurosaki was looking at her with this confused look on her face.

Whatever. I still want revenge on both of them.

And now, I have two brains (Ishida and Ulquiorra) to help me in my revenge now.


	10. Chapter 10

**8 Feb, 8pm, Home**

_Come to the dark side. We have cookies__. says_:

Hitsugaya-kun! You there?

_Living in a winter wonderland. says:_

Hi Ulquiorra. Wanna discuss revenge now?

_Come to the dark side. We have cookies. says:_

Okay. Hang on, Ishida is online too. Shall I add him to this convo?

_Living in a winter wonderland. says:_

Okay.

_Thimble-ina has been added to the conversation._

_Living in a winter wonderland. says:_

Hey Ishida. Why the weird name?

_Thimble-ina says:_

What's wrong with it?

_Come to the dark side. We have cookies. says:_

It's stupid. And the fact that your display picture is of a thimble isn't helping.

_Thimble-ina says:_

Fine, I'll change my online name. I LIKE my display pic.

_Living in a winter wonderland. says:_

Ew. Weird sewing freak.

_Thimble-ina says:_

Oi!

_Living in a winter wonderland. says:_

Whatever.

_In the land of the thimbles, do as the thimbles do. says:_

Is this better?

_Come to the dark side. We have cookies. says:_

No. worse.

_Thimbles are cool. says:_

This?

_Living in a winter wonderland. says:_

Whatever. Lets us continue our discussion.

_Thimbles are cool. says:_

What discussion?

_Come to the dark side. We have cookies. says:_

Revenge.

_Thimbles are cool. says:_

Oh.

_Living in a winter wonderland. says:_

Let's see…something to do with ink, maybe?

_Thimbles are cool. says:_

Why ink?

_Living in a winter wonderland. says:_

I'm in the Calligraphy Club. I can have access to lots and lots of ink.

_Come to the dark side. We have cookies. says:_

Okay, we can consider the ink. What about some bugs or something? Judging by Kurosaki-kun's reaction with the cockroach the other day, it would be a great idea.

_Thimbles are cool. says:_

OhohOH what about spiders? There are tons of those around my house.

_Living in a winter wonderland. says:_

Oh yeah. And spider spray.

_Come to the dark side. We have cookies. says:_

Spider spray? Oh, you mean…OH I get it! I'll bring an empty spray can tomorrow, then.

_Thimbles are cool. says:_

What?

_Living in a winter wonderland. says:_

I'll explain that part in class tomorrow. We can set it up before they come in, since we're always, like, the first 3 in class.

_Thimbles are cool. says:_

Okay!

_Come to the dark side. We have cookies. says:_

Sounds fine to me. What do I bring?

_Living in a winter wonderland. says:_

Ulquiorra, you bring an empty spray can, a permanent marker, and a dead lizard. Ishida, you bring a spider that doesn't jump around (preferably) and superglue. I'll supply the ink.

_Come to the dark side. We have cookies. says:_

Dead lizard?

_Thimbles are cool. says:_

I'll bring that.

_Living in a winter wonderland. says:_

All right, we're all set. See you tomorrow!

_Thimbles are cool. says:_

Cya!

_Come to the dark side. We have cookies. says:_

Goodnight.

_Come to the dark side. We have cookies. has logged off._

_Thimbles are cool. had logged off._

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Thanks to jaguar003 for this idea!

Hmm, what will Hitsugaya do with superglue, ink, a spider and a dead lizard? I wonder.

In the next chapter, Ichigo vs spider, lizard, and ink!

(The lizard bit will be based on an experience my friend had one day after geography. It's exactly the same as Ichigo's experience with the lizard.)


	11. Chapter 11

**19 Feb, 2.15 pm, on the bus on the way home**

Had to write this on the bus so Matsumoto wouldn't suspect me.

Today's revenge worked SO well!

What we did was fill the empty spray can with ink, and then we wrote 'Spider Spray'. Then we hid it in the cupboard, knowing full well that Matsumoto would see it when she opened it to get the broom to sweep the area around her desk. (Neat freak.)

Stage 1: Spider spray – complete.

Then we waited.

Next to come in were Matsumoto and Kurosaki.

Matsumoto swept around her table, then left. Kurosaki left too.

Five minutes later, Stage 2: Lizard and Stage 3: Spider were complete.

All we needed now was to wait for lesson time.

First lesson of the day: History.

Kurosaki pulled out his History book, and Ishida's spider jumped out. Onto the desk.

Now, Matsumoto's table is near Kurosaki's so she saw the spider too.

By then, Nemu-sensei had seen the spider too. And she screamed.

Matsumoto was like, "There's spider spray in the cupboard! I'll go get it!"

She reached into the cupboard and grabbed the spray can. Aiming at the spider, she sprayed.

Fortunately for the spider, the spray nozzle was the wrong way round. (i.e. pointing at her.)

The ink inside the spray bottle drenched her from head to toe.

Mission: Matsumoto complete.

Then after Geography, (the last lesson) Kurosaki packed his bag, hoisted it on his shoulder, and turned around.

"AACK! There's a dead lizard on my chair!"

He was looking at, of course, the semi-conscious lizard we'd superglued to his chair.

"AACK! It's moving! IT'S ALIVE!"

Oh yes. Revenge is sweet. Mission: Kurosaki complete.

Man, I wish I had a camera to snap a video of Kurosaki jumping around going "It's alive!".

Even Kyouraku-sensei was laughing his head off.

Cool, right?


	12. Chapter 12

**20 Feb, Class Time, Classroom 2-2**

Yes! FINALLY, after so many theory lessons, we have a Chem practical lesson.

Mayuri-sensei is just so darn COOL! It's just a pity that he's creepy too. I can't believe he's Nemu-sensei's FATHER.

Yeah, so today we were testing for hydrogen. You light a burning splint and put it at the mouth of the tube. Then it goes out with a 'pop' sound.

Of course, Renji and Ikkaku (lab partners) just had to ruin the lesson. They have this stupid motto: "Bigger is better."

So what did they do? They took 1 LITRE of Sulphuric acid and mixed it with lots and lots of calcium oxide. Then they lit the splint.

BOOM.

Fortunately (for us, not them), the blast only hit them, Kurosaki and Matsumoto (who were working next to them). And then we were treated to a spectacular show of the 4 of them jumping around going "OWW! It burns!"

And then while hopping around like headless chickens, they knocked over this beaker of water at 80 degrees Celcius heating up nearby. It fell on Renji's hand.

Then he started running around in pain and blind panic, in search of cool water, and totally forgetting that the TAP had cool water. Then he spotted this beaker of ice at one of the empty tables. He ran towards it, also apparently forgetting that 1: big objects moving at high speed find it hard to stop and 2: the shelf built into the front of the table contained a lot of glass apparatus.

CRASH.

All the glass broke.

So as a result of 'improper lab behavior', as Mayuri-sensei calls it (I call it the amazing hydrogen saga), Renji was fined $20, and then were subjected to total humiliation by being shrieked at by both Mayuri-sensei and Urahara-sensei (drawn over by the ruckus) about safety in the lab.

Al in all, a great lesson.


	13. Chapter 13

Hey! sorry for late update, ffnet had some weird glitch for the past 2 days.

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**23 Feb, Class Time, Classroom 2-2**

I happened to notice that Kurosaki never looks at what he types. He can yak away, and type. I don't think he actually looks at what he's typing. Until it comes back from the teachers.

So, being bored, I decided to pick on that today in Social Studies.

We were all filing happily into the com lab. Kurosaki sat down at the com he always uses (because some idiot always leaves it on), and started typing his essay.

Then he walked off to talk to his cronies (the both of us were alone in that aisle of computers). So I reached over and plucked some keys off the keyboard and switched them around.

Yeah, then he came back and continued typing, never once looking where he was typing (I suspect he has this mental image of the keyboard in his mind), always staring at MY essay and making snide comments. When it was done, he printed it. (He pressed Alt followed by Down about 11 times)

Then he handed it in to Aizen-sensei.

At the end of the lesson, Aizen-sensei shoved his essay under the projector, and said

"This is bad typing."

Kurosaki yelped in surprise, and looked down at his keyboard. He saw a perfectly normal one. (I switched the keys back while he was in the loo.)

Then the entire class started laughing (at his essay).

It looked a little something like this:

_I feel that hunting for sport and trophies is an abominable crime. Flsjdjckga coajci cie cfjd cu, jsj kmkmk ofdbnvlodn. Hsvksdjd ofnj cjdb sd, lxdvm dofm sef, docjw sdicj wifj!_

_Gndjkcdbv dfjkf rj g a flb fkfmb. Kjfjbgbek klsv eri gj efjk. H vif dkcnas odnns, frhe db fiv jfksg. Pej, sldj fi dowi fi so dik oewndop szi._

_Tkdsbvkdfj, osjkscpd jidfn eicv sdic ekihwflk. Weowefb jf 13hf jshdu jwe8fb._

_Hi:_

_Fjrcfbhd Hsk3be_

I think I pulled a stomach muscle from laughing.


	14. Chapter 14

**24 Feb****, Class Time, Classroom 2-2**

Well, today we had a (relatively) interesting lesson with Byakuya-sensei.

Instead of reciting boring sakura-related haikus to us today (I wonder where he manages to find so many!), he decided to have a discussion.

He let us choose the topic (which was TOTALLY unlike him). So of course, our class, being sadistic, lame, and having a good memory, decided to ask him about his long sojourn in the toilet. (The time when he got locked in.)

He gave us this cold stare, and went,

"That is one of the most stupidest discussion topics I have ever heard."

Then Ishida, Ulquiorra, and I, being grammar freaks and all, took it upon ourselves to tell him that he could not use two comparatives (most and stupidest) in the same sentence in concert.

Which is not the best thing you can say to a language teacher.

Luckily, before he could reward us with his favourite punishment (to copy out a poem on sakuras, and do a satisfactory illustration below it), Kurosaki decided to persevere on with the toilet question anyway.

In the end, Byakuya-sensei threatened to get Aizen-sensei to come and lead the discussion if no one came up with an intelligent discussion topic. Suddenly, the entire class started flapping around, bombarding Byakuya-sensei with random ideas.

So, in the end, someone (probably Isane/Kiyone/Matsumoto) suggested that we talk about pets. So we did.

We actually had a good time.

We found out that Byakuya-sensei used to have this cat at home called Hisana. (Used to because apparently Hisana died a few years ago.)

Matsumoto has a grey cat called Haineko (because ash is gray, like its fur, apparently)

Isane and Kiyone own a pair of hamsters.

Byakuya-sensei even told us (after making us swear on pain of death that we wouldn't tell) that Gin-sensei had a bunny named Chappy (a cartoon character).

Weird.


	15. Chapter 15

**25 Feb, Social Studies, Classroom 2-2**

I'm writing this now because Aizen-sensei's absent today.

Had Music lesson today with Gin-sensei. We are FINALLY doing a new song on recorders (except those who hate hate HATE recorders, like me. Those do other instruments, so I'm playing piano, Ishida does violin, and Ulquiorra plays flute).

We were so excited-after all, after anout a month or so of playing 'Mary had a Little Lamb',you'd HATE even the slightest mention of it.

So we were all waiting for Gin-sensei to reveal to us the new song. When he finally did, I was shocked. After all, he'd told us it was his favourite.

The Chappy And Friends Theme Song.

So he DOES like Chappy!

The whole class cracked up, laughing so hard. (Because Byakuya-sensei was actually right about something teacher-related. He usually is really wrong about them. Like that time he told us Urahara-sensei's absence from school was because he went to dye his hair neon pink.)

Then he started dishing out the parts.

The entire class had to play an incredibly easy recorder part. However, since there were no piano, violin, or flute parts (just recorder and voice), we thought that we had to sing.

The entire class thought that too, chanting "Sing! Sing!" at the top of their voices.

Then Gin-sensei told us,

"Okay, you three, just go sit over there and comment on their performance."

Which basically means that we get to slack! Yeah!

Feel so happy now. I don't like sitting up there playing the piano. Everyone keeps sniggering over the fact that I have to sit on a phone directory to play the piano properly. (Gin-sensei won't let me lower the chair. He doesn't like adjusting it back later.)


	16. Chapter 16

**26 Feb, Class Time, Classroom 2-2**

I should have suspected something was wrong when Kurosaki started acting placid all of a sudden.

He was plotting revenge against me for the keyboard saga. And the amazing lizard saga.

So today, he got his revenge.

I had this wood carving done for art. Goodness knows where he got them from, but he released an army of termites onto my carving.

Squish.

Okay, that was a random termite.

Wait…don't termites eat paper?

Crap. More later. Have to save my diary.


	17. Chapter 17

**2 March, Class Time, Classroom 2-2**

I bet Kurosaki had a whale of a time laughing his ass off last Friday.

Seeing a stoic classmate tear out the room clutching his diary isn't a very common sight, I guess.

Hmph. I shall have revenge (what else is new?). Not now, though. I think I used a lot of my imagination today in Language Arts.

A lot of our teachers are getting replaced. Byakuya-sensei and Gin-sensei decided to leave on a Masters course, so they will be gone for a year or two. In Byakuya-sensei's place we now have Apache-sensei. She's rather small, about my height. But she has a VERY loud voice, and a very strange and sadistic sense of humour. Today, she came to class and announced,

"We're going to do a STORY RELAY!"

So she made us sit in rows of 5 (on the floor). When everyone was seated, she gave each of us a piece of paper, and told us that she would give us a topic. We would then have one minute to think of what to write, and two minutes to write it. She then gave us the topic.

'Fire and Ice'.

After we finished one paragraph, she made us pass it down the row. One paragraph, one person. After five paragraphs, they were returned to the original person. My row had me (duh!), Kurosaki, Ulquiorra, Ishida, and Renji.

My compo turned out something like this:

_They were so unlike each other that it was hard to believe that they were twins. One had a fiery spirit, always overly enthusiastic; the other was cool, calm, and collected, never one to show his worry. They always opposed each other, like fire and ice. (Hitsugaya)_

_They hated each other. They loathed each other. To him, she was needlessly wasting energy; to her, he was nothing but a wet blanket. Their intense sibling rivalry continued, until one day, that incident tore it all apart. (Kurosaki)_

_After that incident, he had always asked himself: why did he ever let her get so drunk that night? For it was that hated drink which caused her untimely demise. He could still remember the sounds he heard that night. A scream in the night. A tyre skidding. An earth-shaking crash. And then, nothing but the eerie silence of the night, and the howl of a lone dog. (Ishida)_

_Drunk, the driver of that car had swerved to avoid the dog, and crashed into the tree. His sister, and her three friends, were too drunk to remember their seatbelts, and were thrown out of the car, dying instantly. And then he was all alone in the world. (Renji)_

_He had stood, a lone figure, at her cremation ceremony, watching her lifeless body slowly being lost in flames. The crowd surged round, offering condolences, but he ignored them all. Without his lively twin, he seemed only a shadow, a vessel hollowed out by grief. The bright flame who had been next to him all his life had been extinguished, and in its absence, his heart closed itself off, sealing itself within an armour of ice. Ice that would never melt again. (Ulquiorra)_

Yeah, I wasn't exactly thinking of my plot when I wrote that beginning paragraph. I must say, it turned out quite well, despite Kurosaki's unimaginative paragraph, Renji repeating the obvious, and Ulquiorra writing an overly emo paragraph. I didn't expect there to be death in it, but I definitely prefer it to a soppy, happy ending.

Tomorrow we meet Gin-sensei's replacement.

………………………………………………………………………………………………………

Heys! This 'story relay' was based on an English lesson we had last week or so. Our topic was 'Twin Towers'. Try it yourself and see what you come up with!


	18. Chapter 18

**3 March, Class Time, Classroom 2-2**

Yoruichi-sensei is going on course too, apparently.

Today, we met our replacements for Gin-sensei and Yoruichi-sensei.

Apparently, Gin-sensei is the only music teacher in the entire school, so no more music. Now we have PHILOSOPHY.

I'm not kidding. Philosophy.

With Tousen-sensei.

So basically, today w started on a random theory. "If a tree falls in the forest and no one heard it, did it really fall?"

We all had mixed views on that one, and started arguing. I have to admit, though, Tousen-sensei had the strongest argument.

He stomped to the front, glared at us all from sightless eyes, and proclaimed:

"It fell."

"But sensei, why?"

"BECAUSE JUSTICE PROCLAIMS IT TO BE SO!"

So much for Tousen-sensei. I forsee a year of unrelieved boredom ahead of me.

For art, Soifon-sensei replaces Yoruichi-sensei.

She walked into class (another shorty teacher) and said,

"Today, we are going to draw based on a reference!"

So she walked around, giving us A4-sized papers with pictures on them to draw.

Cat. Cat. Cat. Cat. Cat. Cat. Cat. Cat. Cat.

Every single one was a cat.

Whee.


	19. Chapter 19

I may include crossovers soon! I know the two kind, benevolent people who went to vote on my profile violently protested against it, I am going to run out of ideas. So if nobody actually contributes any suggestions through reviews for a period of one week, crossovers are going in. And first on the list of possible crossovers in most probably -Man.

………………………………………………………………………………………………………

**4 March, Class Time, Classroom 2-2**

Nothing much happened today. We were all dragged to the auditorium and giving a wonderful, spectacular lecture about our school's vision, mission, and motto. By the prinicipal, Yamamoto Shigekuni Genryuusai.

He stomped in front and boomed,

"I can see everyone from here, and I can see whop is talking, who is closing their eyes, and who is sleeping. So don't fall asleep OR ELSE."

Whatever. His voice could bore the paint off the walls, did you know that? I think halfway through, the only person who was actually wide awake and listening was Tousen-sensei. His love of justice probably keeps him immune to boredom. Even Kyouraku-sensei and Ukitake-sensei, who studied under Principal Yamamoto before and were probably immune to the sedative effect of his voice by now, were both fast asleep. Kenpachi-sensei was snoring so loudly, I bet even the turtles on the Galapagos Islands could hear him.

Then after that, we trudged back to class for an hour-long History lesson, followed by Philosophy. All in all, a boring day.


	20. Chapter 20

**5 March, Class Time, Classroom2-2**

We had a relatively interesting Bio practical today.

Urahara-sensei bouncedinto the lab today, and announced,

"Today we are testing for starch in leaves!"

We all stared at the teacher's bench. It was devoid of leaves of any sort.

One brave soul asked, "Urahara-sensei, where are the leaves we're going to be using?"

He blinked.

"Good point."

He ran off in the direction of the staffroom, and came back wielding a huge bonsai. The (un)lucky bonsai was then treated to a haircut. (Basically he snipped all the leaves off)

"There! We'll use these!"

Just as we were about to surge forward to claim the leaves, we heard a very angry yell coming from the lab door.

"Kisuke, you BASTARD! Give me back my bonsai at ONCE!"

It was Apache-sensei.

Anyways, after Urahara gleefully chucked the pot contaning a rather bonsai into Apache-sensei's face, we proceeded with the experiment. Along the way, we had a few casualties and mess-ups.

First, we boiled the leaves in water. (Renji heated his directly and burnt it to a crisp. He also started a mini-fire by dropping the burning leaf onto his worksheet.)

Then, we decolorized them in alcohol. (Ikkaku drank his and had to be lugged to the sick bay.)

After that, we rinsed the leaves. (Kurosaki looked at the leftover green-coloured alcohol, and dumped it on Isane's head.)

Then we tested them with iodine. (Matsumoto spilled the iodine down the front of her lab coat.)

Indeed, an exciting lesson.


	21. Chapter 21

**6 March, Class Time, Classroom 2-2**

I think I know why our class is so small now. It's because all the transfer students can be lumped together in our class.

A new student came today.

He's got GREEN HAIR. Not to mention that he's got a weird name. Weirder than even Ulquiorra's. Which is saying a lot. I mean, if Schiffer isn't weird, then I don't know what your definition of weird is.

His name is Grimmjow Jeagerjaques (at least, I think it's spelled like this).

Within the first hour with Grimmjow in class, he had scared the life out of Rukia, Isane, Kiyone, and Oomaeda by yelling and swearing at them. Thereafter, Ishida, Ulquiorra, and I decided to quote from our TKAM (To Kill A Mockingbird, our lit book) and told him that we would book him for swearing in the hearing of a female.

"Ya think I care?"

"Yes."

"Whatever. Like I'm going to listen to a weird shorty anyways."

"Don't call me shorty, chlorophyll-head."

At that point in time, Kurosaki stepped in, dragged Grimmjow out, and asked him something.

Five seconds later, Grimmjow was officially inducted as the fourth member of the Kurosaki gang.

Oh well, more people to annoy later.


	22. Chapter 22

Thanks to Kaiser Washington for this one.

………………………………………………………………………………………………………..

**9 March, History, Classroom 2-2**

Yes, another transfer student. He's from the same school as Grimmjow, the Hueco Mundo Academy (where Aizen-sensei, Gin-sensei, and Tousen-sensei graduated from. Ulquiorra came from the primary school there too.). He was sick on Friday, which is why he didn't come. He's got LURID PINK hair.

His name's Syazel Aporro something. We managed to induct him into our group (because, as Ulquiorra says, having another genius to help in revenge plans won't hurt, not to mention that he hates Grimmjow a lot).

………………………………………………………………………………………………………..

_Hitsugaya: Hey, Syazel. Is it fun, being Ishida's seating partner?_

_Syazel: No! I HATE it!_

_Ulquiorra: All the sewing talk is driving you nuts, right?_

_S: YES! He's a total IDIOT!_

_H, U: Agree._

_Ishida: Are you passing notes in class again? Oh wait…_

_H,U,S: Oi Ishida don't read that!_

_I: I am NOT an idiot!_

_H,U,S: Are TOO._

_I: What are you talking about anyway?_

_H,U,S: Something._

_I: Yes, very helpful. Thanks._

_H,U,S: You're welcome._

_H: What about an online meeting tonight?_

_S: What for?_

_H: Revenge plans on the Kurosaki gang._

_S: Count me in._

_H: Definitely. I'll add you. Gimme your email._

_S: _

_H: Weird email Okay, I'll add you, see you guys on msn tonight at 8._

_I,U,S: Okay._

_I: She's looking this way._

_H,U,S: Crap._

I will pay attention in class.

I will pay attention in class.

I will pay attention in class.

I will pay attention in class.

I will pay attention in class.

I will pay attention in class.

I will pay attention in class.

I will pay attention in class.

I will pay attention in class.

I will pay attention in class.

I will pay attention in class.

I will pay attention in class.

I will pay attention in class.

I will pay attention in class.

I will pay attention in class.

I will pay attention in class.

I will pay attention in class.

I will pay attention in class.

I will pay attention in class.

I will pay attention in class.

I will pay attention in class.

I will pay attention in class.

I will pay attention in class.

I will pay attention in class.

I will pay attention in class.

I will pay attention in class.

I will pay attention in class.

I will pay attention in class.

I will pay attention in class.

I will pay attention in class.


	23. Chapter 23

Yes, I realised that Syazel's email doesn't show.

So, If you wanna know it, take 'eternal-perfectionist' and connect it to the suffix one uses on all hotmail email addresses.

………………………………………………………………………………………………………..

**10 March, Health Ed, Computer Lab 3.1**

_Living in a winter wonderland. says:_

Wow, chatting during lesson time when we were actually supposed to be doing research.

_Come to the dark side. We have cookies. says:_

Not like Unohana-sensei actually cares, right?

_Living in a winter wonderland. says:_

Let's add Syazel and Ishida to this convo.

_Come to the dark side. We have cookies. says:_

Anything.

_Thimbles are cool. has been added to the conversation._

_Geek in the Pink. has been added to the conversation._

_Living in a winter wonderland. says:_

Hi, guys.

_Geek in the Pink. says: _

Hi.

_Thimbles are cool. says: _

Ooh, chatting in class. Naughty naughty

_Living in a winter wonderland. says:_

You're doing it too!

_Thimbles are cool. says:_

What shall we talk about?

_Come to the dark side. We have cookies. says:_

Hey, next week is the holidays, right? Let's go hang out somewhere.

_Geek in the Pink. says:_

STARBUCKS!

_Living in a winter wonderland. says:_

Which one?

_Geek in the Pink. .says:_

The one at the Seireitei Mall?

_Thimbles are cool. says:_

Fine with me_._

_Come to the dark side. We have cookies. says:_

Hey guys, minimize this window. She's looking.

_Come to the dark side. We have cookies. says:_

Okay, she's not looking anymore.

_Living in a winter wonderland. says:_

So, Starbucks next Monday, at 8am then?

_Geek in the Pink. says:_

Fine with me.

_Thimbles are cool. says:_

Okies.

_Come to the dark side. We have cookies. says:_

Crap. She's coming.

_Thimbles are cool. says:_

AAH! Minimize minimize minimize!

I will not chat online in class.

I will not chat online in class.

I will not chat online in class.

I will not chat online in class.

I will not chat online in class.

I will not chat online in class.

I will not chat online in class.

I will not chat online in class.

I will not chat online in class.

I will not chat online in class.

I will not chat online in class.

I will not chat online in class.

I will not chat online in class.

I will not chat online in class.

I will not chat online in class.


	24. Chapter 24

**11 March, ****2 pm****, On the bus on the way home**

Cross-country meet today. Nothing much interesting happened, until going-home time.

The four of us (Ishida, Ulquiorra, Syazel, and me) decided to take the bus. And as luck would have it, all of us were headed to the bus interchange.

What happened for the next 2-3 hours was complete chaos.

It went something like this.

oOoOo

"Ne, Hitsugaya-kun, I think that's the bus stop."

"Really?"

"Yes."

"Okay."

-one minute later-

"Okay, which bus?"

"Bus 175."

"Hey look! 175!"

"Flag it down!"

-Syazel flaps arm pointlessly-

"ARGH it's not stopping!"

"Hang on a minute."

-pause-

"Hey! 175 doesn't even STOP here! Ishida you complete DOLT!"

"Excuse me, Hitsugaya-kun. 175 stops on the other side of the road."

"And how do you know that, Kuchiki-san?"

-Rukia points-

"Hey! 175 is there!"

"Let's go! CHARGE across the road!"

-a sprint later-

"AAAH! 175, wait for us~"

"Syazel, stop freaking out."

"Yeah, we'll just wait for the next one."

When we finally got onto the bus, more chaos erupted.

"Hey, erm… I think we're going the wrong way. I happened to notice that the board thing on the back of the bus stop which lists the stops the bus stops at doesn't have the interchange on it."

"WHAT?!"

oOoOo

After that, we spent about an hour wandering from bus stop to bus stop, until we finally found one that went to the interchange.

Yes, SO not a waste of time.

We should have called a taxi instead.


	25. Chapter 25

Hi! Sorry for the long update.

I am almost out of ideas, so crossovers are coming in, starting from the entry March 23. -Man characters are coming into thestory, if you have any particular character you would really like to see, do review and tell me. Ditto for you people out there with violent objections to DGM or crossovers in general.

……………………………………………………………………………………………….

**12 March, Class Time, Classroom 2-2**

Nothing special actually happened today. Just that little incident at PE.

The day after cross-country, we have to go for PE. And run some more. About 3-4 km.

It was today that we discovered that Syazel is actually quite good at sports.

Since he had a stomachache yesterday, today was our first time seeing him run. When Kenpachi-sensei blew the starting whistle, he just dashed straight to the front. Everybody let him do that, on the assumption that after 1 or 2 rounds, he would slow down out of fatigue.

Wrong.

He breezed through the first four rounds, and then, amazingly, he SPED UP for the last 4.

By the time everyone else finished their second round, he was casually sprinting towards the finishing point on his 8th and final round. With a HUUUGE grin on his face.

Then, after the rest of us came in, panting heavily (about 20-30 minutes later), he said,

"Wow, that was refreshing!"

I think the Kurosaki gang was ready to murder him. They usually were the first to finish.

Then, after warm-ups, we played netball. Of course, Syazel joined our team. Once he did, everybody was suddenly clamouring to be part of the team. Quite the achievement for the geeks.

The final lineup was something like this.

Team 1 (Me, Syazel, Ulquiorra, Ishida, Rukia, Isane, Kiyone)

versus

Team 2 (Kurosaki, Renji, Ikkaku, Grimmjow, Matsumoto, Oomaeda)

The Kurosaki team had less people, so they got to start first.

We won 19-0.

Syazel can run really fast. Really really fast. And who ever knew Isane was so good at shooting hoops? Or that Rukia can intercept balls, regardless of how high they've been thrown?

Maybe my class isn't that hopeless after all.


	26. Chapter 26

is having some problem with the 'publish' function, so this took quite a while to come out. Sorry 'bout that.

……………………………………………………………………………………………….

**13 March, Class Time, Quadrangle**

Today, Friday the 13th, is the last day of the term! To celebrate, we had a huge class party today.

Our schedule went something like this:

Math:

Ukitake-sensei gave out MnM's and told us that we could do anything we wanted for that hour.

History:

Lessons as usual. Nemu-sensei is unmovable and impossible to manipulate.

Geography:

Kyouraku-sensei, in accordance to a previous agreement, donated his hour-long lesson to us, so we all trooped down to the quadrangle (where we have assembly) to start the class party.

Recess:

PARTY!

Art:

Acting on Yoruichi-sensei's request, Soifon-sensei told us that she was to give us her lesson for the party as well. Seeing as we were all done with the food, we played class bonding games. By 'class bonding games', I mean Whacko. (Whacko is a game where you have to try and prevent yourself from getting whacked by yelling out someone else's name. That person will then yell another name, and…well, you get the idea.)

Language Arts:

Apache-sensei made us all pack up and return to class. Then, she let us watch a movie, Across The Universe. [Author's note: There is such a movie. It's NC-16 where I come from, but PG-13 in America, so when we watched it, our teacher told us to pretend that we were in America.]

Assembly:

Technically, this is when we all troop down to the hall or auditorium for a boring talk, but this being the last day of the term, we had nothing scheduled for it. So Isane, the class chair, told us to go down to the quadrangle for a game of Don't Forget The Lyrics. The class got split into half, and coincidentally, we ended up in our netball teams. Except this time, Isane wasn't playing. (Well, someone has to control the music, right?) We won, 7-6.

After that, school ended.

So yeah, this was probably the best Friday so far.

……………………………………………………………………………………………….

Yes! One term is over, and next term will bring so many more surprises.

Hitsugaya's class party was based on my own. We had ours on the same day, and the events were about the same. Except that we had to endure 2 hours of boring lessons before LA, when out form teacher dragged us downstairs for the party.

At this point, I would like to thank **Kaiser Washington**, my most faithful reviewer. Thanks for reviewing chapter after chapter, even when nobody else does.


	27. Chapter 27

**16 March, 8pm, On the bus on the way home**

Today was the first (official) day of the March holidays.

It was also Starbucks day.

Basically, the four of us met up at Starbucks at the Seireitei Mall. We got a drink, and then we decided to catch a movie at the newly revamped Las Noches shopping mall near Ulquiorra's house (or so he claims).

Our first mistake.

Working on the assumption that proximity breeds familiarity, we all happily trusted his directions for taking the train…and ended up on the opposite side of town.

Obviously, we had all forgotten that Ulquiorra never takes the train. Only the bus.

So, after we finally realized that we were nowhere near the Las Noches Mall and had gotten of the train at the next stop, Ishida pointed out the window of the train station at the bus interchange.

"Let's take the bus."

Being the trusting fools that we were, we immediately assumed that Ishida was familiar with the bus route to the mall.

We also forgot the cross-country saga.

So we went to the interchange, and got onto the first bus we saw (on Ishida's recommendation).

After five stops:

"Hey, Ishida. Which stop are we getting off at?"

"Er…erm…five, no six more stops!"

"You sure?"

"…"

"I'll take that as a yes, then."

However, once we alighted, chaos erupted.

"Where are we?"

"I could ask you the same thing."

"Whaddya mean by that, Ishida you dolt! YOU were the one who told us to get of here!"

"Calm down, Syazel."

"I will NOT! I am running on a caffeine high and I demand for an answer!"

Ishida sighed, and pushed his glasses up his nose.

"Why should I know where we are? I don't take bus 77."

"But you TOLD us to take that one!"

"It was the first bus to arrive."

"Shouldn't you be acquainted with the bus routes?"

"No. Why should I?"

"Hmm, lemme see…could it be that YOU WERE THE ONE WHO SUGGESTED IT?!"

"I suggested it, I agree. That doesn't mean that I would know the route. It was simply a suggestion. One of you could have asked the obvious."

"Which would be…?"

"If I knew the route there."

It took Ulquiorra, me, and a several dozen conks on the head with Ulquiorra's backpack (which weighs a ton, what does he put in there: bricks?) to subdue a screaming Syazel on a caffeine high. It then took another few hundred thwacks to get Ishida out of his Ha!-This-is-all-your-fault-and-has-nothing-to-do-with-me mode.

After wandering around for ten minutes, we finally caught a cab and reached the mall.

Now, this is where we all assumed that nothing else would go wrong.

Second mistake.

After getting tickets to watch the third X-Men movie [Author's note: I know, this movie is really old. It was the only suitable one, the only other movies I could think of at the point in time that I was writing this being Spongebob or the Incredibles.], we all proceeded to the snacks store to buy snacks to eat while watching the movie.

We all got popcorn and Coke, except for Syazel, who got nachos (with cheese) and a milkshake.

Then we all went into the theatre.

Halfway through, Ishida felt nature's call, so he decided to get up and go. (You know, go…? To the loo…? Okay, never mind.)

That's when the trouble started.

"Ishida you A**! Look what you've done! Now there's COKE all over my shirt!"

"Well, now it looks nicer."

Syazel spluttered.

"Close your mouth, Syazel. You look like a goldfish."

Syazel abruptly closed his mouth.

"You're gonna PAY for that, Ishida Uryuu!"

He dipped a nacho into the cheese dip and flung it at Ishida, who dodged it neatly.

SPLAT.

The nacho-bomb landed on the face of the usher who had come to see what all the ruckus was about.

He then dragged them out (but just the two of them, because Ulquiorra and I scrooged down in our seats and tried to hide, and he ignored us.).

The last thing we heard before the doors closed were,

"Look what you've done, Ishida! You've made a fool of everyone!"

After the movie ended, Ulquiorra and I made a solemn oath before leaving the theatre:

Never ever let either Ishida or Syazel buy food and/or drink when watching a movie.


	28. Chapter 28

**17 March, 7pm, Home**

_Momo and the flying plum says:_

Hi, Shiro-chan!

_Living in a winter wonderland. says:_

DON'T call me that, _neshonben Momo_.

_Momo and the flying plum says:_

Aww, Shiro-chan, that's mean! You know I don't wet my bed anymore!

_Living in a winter wonderland. says:_

Like I care. You're still calling me by that vulgar nickname, neshonben Momo.

_Momo and the flying plum says:_

Hmph! You're so mean, Hitsugaya-kun.

_Living in a winter wonderland. says:_

Oh? Getting polite all of a sudden? Couldn't stand the name-calling, could you?

_Momo and the flying plum says:_

I'm adding someone to the conversation.

_Living in a winter wonderland. says:_

Why? 'Cause I can't call you by that nickname in front of someone else?

_Despair. has been added to the conversation._

_Living in a winter wonderland. says:_

Despair? Who's that?

_Despair. says:_

Me.

_Living in a winter wonderland. says:_

Very helpful, thank you. After all, there's only one 'me' in the world, right?

_Despair. says:_

There is?

_Momo and the flying plum says:_

No, he was being sarcastic.

_Despair. says:_

Oh. If you want to know, I'm Kira.

_Living in a winter wonderland. says:_

I see.

_Despair. says:_

What are you two talking about?

_Momo and the flying plum says:_

Nothing much.

_Despair. says:_

I just thought of a very random idea.

_Living in a winter wonderland. says:_

What?

_Despair. says:_

Why don't we add lots of people to this convo? Like a group discussion.

_Momo and the flying plum says:_

Cool! Let's try.

_Geek in the Pink. has been added to the conversation._

_My hair is NOT white. has been added to the conversation._

_Chappy forever has been added to the conversation._

_Azure peacocks rock. has been added to the conversation._

_So what if I have a scar on my face? has been added to the conversation._

_Come to the dark side. We have cookies. has been added to the conversation._

_Despair. says:_

Hinamori, I think that's enough people.

_My hair is NOT white. says:_

Who are you?

_Living in a winter wonderland. says:_

He's Kira from Class 2-3.

_My hair is NOT white. says:_

And you are…?

_Living in a winter wonderland. says:_

Hitsugaya. And FYI, your hair IS white, Isane.

_My hair is NOT white. says:_

No, it's not! It's SILVER.

_So what if I have a scar on my face? says:_

Okay, quit the salon talk.

_My hair is NOT white. says:_

Who are you?

_Despair says:_

Argh, enough with all the 'who are yous'. Why don't we all just introduce ourselves?

_Momo and the flying plum says:_

Good idea. I'm Hinamori.

_Living in a winter wonderland. says:_

Which is pretty obvious, because your first name is there. I'm Hitsugaya.

_Despair. says:_

Kira.

_My hair is NOT white. says:_

Isane, Class 2-2.

_Azure peacocks rock. says:_

Ayasegawa Yumichika, Class 2-1.

_So what if I have a scar on my face? says:_

Hisagi Shuuhei. Class 2-3.

_Geek in the Pink. says:_

Syazel, just transferred here recently, Class 2-2.

_Come to the dark side. We have cookies. says:_

Ulquiorra.

_Chappy forever. says:_

Kuchiki Rukia, avid Chappy fan.

_Despair. says:_

That's obvious.

_Living in a winter wonderland. says:_

Hey Yumi, why 'azure peacocks'?

_Azure peacocks rock. says:_

I like the colour azure, and I also like peacocks. 'Rock' happened to rhyme with 'peacock', so I put that in.

_So what if I have a scar on my face? says:_

Ahem. What are we supposed to be talking about?

_Despair. says:_

Nothing at the moment.

_Azure peacocks rock. says:_

Hey, I heard you people from 2-2 had a class party?

_Chappy forever. says:_

That's right.

_So what if I have a scar on my face? says:_

Lucky.

_My hair is NOT white. says:_

Yeah, Kyouraku-sensei and Soifon-sensei gave us their lessons for more party time.

_Despair. says:_

No fair. Urahara-sensei just dished out candies, and Mayuri-sensei gave us a whole stack of homework.

_Geek in the Pink. says:_

Your form and co-form teachers are both science teachers?

_Despair. says:_

Yes.

_Come to the dark side. We have cookies. says:_

Wow.

_Geek in the Pink. says:_

Hey guys, I've gotta go. Wonderwice is bugging me to let him use the computer.

_Chappy forever. says:_

Wonderwice?

_Geek in the Pink. says:_

Yeah. My little brother. Seeya!

_Geek in the Pink has logged off._

_My hair is NOT white. says:_

Sorry, I have to go too. Kiyone's whining is getting on my nerves.

_My hair is NOT white. has logged off._

_Chappy forever has logged off._

_So what if I have a scar on my face? says:_

Wow, so many people are logging off at once.

_Living in a winter wonderland. says:_

Yeah, me too. Good night.

_You have logged off._

……………………………………………………………………………………………….

*sighs* pretty lame, the ending…

Just for those who were wondering, 'neshonben Momo' means 'bedwetter Momo'.

Review, as always!


	29. Chapter 29

**23 March, Class Time, Classroom 2-2**

New term starts today.

So it would be perfectly logical to chuck another bunch of transfer students into our class.

This time, they're from an international school in Kyushu.

So today, we met them for the first time.

Kyouraku-sensei bounced into class today, and announced very loudly:

"Class, come greet your new classmates!"

Outsaide the door, we could hear a voice going : "He's so cheery, it scares me."

"Shut up! They can hear you!"

Kyouraku-sensei sighed.

"Class, we have four new students from the Katsura International School in Kyushu."

Then he went and opened the door, and four people walked in.

The first was a guy with an eyepatch (like Kenpachi-sensei's) and red hair to rival Renji's.

Followed by a short guy (though still taller than me) with white hair and a weird scar.

Then two girls stepped in. The first had dark green hair and violet eyes. The other, taller, one had long black hair in a ponytail, and was carrying a pair of tonfa.

Kyouraku-sensei introduced them to us, in the order that they came in.

"This is Lavi-kun, Allen-kun, Lenalee-chan, and Kanda-kun."

Kun?! The ponytailed person was a GUY?! Oh dear.

Then things got worse.

The ponytailed guy was assigned to sit next to me. The redhead sat next to Ulquiorra, who was sitting on the other side of me. (We were sitting four in a row.) Gosh, the ponytailed guy (Kanda, I think his name was) is creepy. I mean, who carries a pair of TONFA around, for goodness' sake?

First impressions can be misleading. Or so we found out.

Kanda, it seems, is just a random emo guy, sort of like Ulquiorra, really. Except he's got a violent streak in him. And as Syazel pointed out, it won't hurt to have someone sadistically violent on our We-Hate-The-Kurosaki-Gang team. After all, he already managed to intimidate Kurosaki at recess.

We were all eating recess today as a class, as is the custom, so it seems, in Class 2-2. Kurosaki was staring at Kanda, who was eating soba, and made the mistake of commenting on his hair.

"Hey, you do know that having long hair and bangs makes you look like a girl, don't ya? Especially since you have a ponytail, too. I mean, only GIRLS have ponytails."

Matsumoto giggled, and Renji and Ikkaku nodded their solemn approval.

I swear, the temperature in the canteen felt as if it had dropped at least 10 degrees.

Kanda raised his tonfa.

"Shut up. Or I will personally make sure that you lose the ability to talk. All it takes is a jab from the tonfa," he hissed.

Lavi sighed.

"Never describe Yuu-chan's hair as feminine. It's a big mistake."

Kanda whirled around.

"And YOU! Don't you dare call me by that name anymore. Understood?"

Lavi looked as if he was on the verge of arguing, but staring at the tonfa, he apparently decided not to.

Allen shook his head.

"Kanda hates being called by his first name. He almost strangled a kid from the elementary side once, you know, because that kid started calling him by his first name."

"Wow," I said.

"Amazing," Ulquiorra agreed.

Ishida nodded his head.

"How about it? Wanna join our gang? You'll get to humiliate Kurosaki as many times as you want."

Kanda stared at Syazel's outstretched hand.

He sighed.

"Che, whatever. As long as I get the chance to beat that idiot up."

Then he walked off to return his tray.

Lavi looked at us.

"Count me in! I just LOVE pranking people."

Then he scampered off, presumably to annoy Kanda some more.

Allen looked sadly at the huge 10-layer bento box he had brought.

"Man, I'm hungry."

Lenalee sighed.

"Allen-kun, you're always hungry."

Then she dragged him off (probably to class) to prevent him from stealing other people's lunch.

And thus our merry band of revenge-seekers welcomed another 2 new members.


	30. Chapter 30

**24 March, Class Time, Classroom 2-2**

I hate chalk.

I hate even more now, after that incident today.

Yeah, the epic adventures of Kurosaki and the chalkboard duster.

Today, Ukitake-sensei was late, so while waiting for him, Kurosaki grabbed our chalkboard duster. And then he stuck it onto the speaker.

Then when Ukitake-sensei walked in., he turned on the com to play a video. It made that sound all coms make when they are turning on, but ultra-loud.

Then the duster fell. On his head.

He started coughing violently. The we started coughing, but not as violently. Chalk dust hurts, you know.

So after he had recovered from his coughing fit, he gave Kurosaki detention. (Because it was pretty obvious who was a fault)

Which is cool.


	31. Chapter 31

**25 March, Class Time, Classroom 2-2**

Kurosaki seems to be counting down to April Fools' Day.

Today he pranked Soifon-sensei.

He dragged a dead cat to school, and smeared red paint all over the classroom floor. Then he took a bucket of red paint and balanced it precariously on top of the classroom door.

Art was first period.

Soifon-sensei opened the door, and the buckets of paint splashed on her head, drenching her from head to toe.

"WHO DID THIS?!"

Everyone cringed at her tone of voice. She stomped in, probably to find the culprit, but ended up slipping on the paint on the floor. She slid along the paint trail, until she came face-to-face with the dead cat.

She blinked. And blinked again. Then she screamed.

"Who killed the cat?"

We all stared. Soifon-sensei, the stoic sensei, was WAILING. Over a CAT.

"Nooo….Yoruichi-samaaaaaaaaaaaaa…"

Blink, blink.

Sweatdrop.

She hugged the dead cat.

Bigger sweatdrop.

Finally, Isane managed to drag her to the sick bay, and asked the nurse to give her a bath and something for shock.

Upon her return, we discovered that Soifon-sensei had refused to let go of the cat, screaming profanities when the nurse tried to pry it from her hands.

If only I had a video camera with me at that time…

But it seems someone beat me to it.

At recess today, I happened to notice something in Renji's bag.

A video camera.


	32. Chapter 32

**26 March, History, Classroom 2-2**

Hitsugaya: Gah, this is boring, who wants to know about the imports and exports of Nicaragua anyway?

Ulquiorra: Totally agree.

Lavi: Passing notes in class, eh?

H: What do you think?

Kanda: Shut up and listen.

L: But Kanda, we aren't talking!

H,U: Yup.

K: Che, whatever.

H: Hey, Kanda, why do you carry around a pair of tonfa? Not to mention that they're STEEL.

K: Mind your own business.

H: Now, Kanda, that's not very nice.

K: Che. Whatever, shrimp.

H: I am NOT a shrimp. Shrimps have shells and feelers and those tickly little legs.

U: He means that you're short.

L: Yup, I mean even Allen is taller that you.

H: Shut up.

K: Che.

H: But anyway why does he carry around tonfa?

L: It used to be worse. He used to have this katana made of wood, but he broke it while whacking someone's head last year. Getting a wooden katana ain't easy, especially if you are underage, so Kanda-pon here opted for a pair of tonfa instead. Says it feels more satisfying to hit people too.

K: Don't call me by that stupid nickname, baka usagi.

L: I am NOT a rabbit!

K: Fine. Carrot.

L: NO!

H: Pineapple.

L: NO!

U: Bell pepper.

L: Ew.

H: Hedgehog.

L: Just stop it with the stupid nicknames! You guys have a WEIRD sense of humour.

H: Pot to kettle, pot to kettle: You're black.

L: Huh?

U: The pot is calling the kettle black.

L: I am NOT a cooking utensil!

H: We didn't say you were.

K: She's coming this way. Stop the passing of the notes now, before I bite you all to death.

L :No use, she's here already.

U: Uh-oh.

………………………………………………………………………………………………………..

Shit. Detention class tomorrow.


	33. Chapter 33

Hey people!

I'm very sorry for the long wait! It seems that the day I've been dreading has arrived at last: the day I get tired of updating this fic. So, this is going to be the last chapter. I apologize deeply for the abrupt ending.

I would also like to thank all the nice people out there who reviewed on my story. I really appreciate it. Ditto for those who put this story on their story alert/favourites list.

Without further ado, the last chapter.

……………………………………………………………………………………………….

**10 April, 8pm, Home**

So many things have happened in such a short span of time.

First, we had our April Fools' Day prank. It turns out that Kurosaki and gang had managed to prank every teacher, and they had compiled those incidents into a single video. This video was then played at Assembly on April Fools' itself.

Needless to say, half the school (or more) wet their pants from laughing too hard. I saw at least 15 topple off their chairs. I mean, it is pretty amusing to see a stoic Art teacher hyperventilating at the sight of a dead cat. Or listen to the wails of your PE teacher who has been locked in the toilet cubicle. Or watch as your dignified Health Ed teacher freak out when she discovered a spider in her drawer. Of course, the numerous happy adventures of Nemu-sensei and the various insects were there too, though I wonder how Kurosaki and gang managed to film it without capturing themselves too.

There were no credits at the end of the video, but since it practically screamed 'done by the Kurosaki gang', everyone knew they had done it. Apparently, the teachers had come to the same conclusion. For the entire week following April Fools', the Kurosaki gang had detention.

Then came two happy accidents in the lab. The first one was during Chem, when we were all happily testing for gases.

Renji and Grimmjow, upon seeing the supply of magnesium on the teacher's table, decided to have some fun.

They took the magnesium, doused it with ethanol and other random flammable substances, and set it alight.

The makeshift bomb glowed really brightly (yes, magnesium glows, and you wouldn't believe how much magnesium they had) before exploding.

Unfortunately, Renji and Grimmjow had forgotten lesson one of Fun With Bombs 101: never stand close to wherever your bomb is, unless you are a suicide bomber.

Luckily for them, the bomb blast wasn't that strong, and thus they got away with burnt hair, burnt uniform, a few broken teeth, and a month's worth of detention with Mayuri-sensei.

The second happy accident was during Bio. We were doing AGE (Agarose Gel Electophoresis).

Step one: Pour the gel.

The Kurosaki gang forgot to masking-tape the open ends of the gel mold before pouring the molten gel in. Needless to say, the gel leaked, and Urahara-sensei was apoplectic. In the end, he gave them his own gel slab to use.

After that, not much happened until we removed the gel slabs from the setup to stain.

We had huge tubs full of a deep blue stain, which we were supposed to plonk the gel into. The Kurosaki gang plonked their gel in enthusiastically, and ended up with blue-and-white uniforms.

Urahara-sensei was pissed. Really pissed.

They got another two weeks' worth of detention for that.

And then there was the incident where Isane accidentally blew up the Home Econs room while screaming at the sight of a fishcake.

Yes, a lot of things have happened. In a span of about three months, I've made new friends, had new experiences, and had a lot of fun.

I used to think that being in this class would suck royally. But now, I can safely say this.

Maybe my life doesn't suck after all.

……………………………………………………………………………………………….

So, for the last time, adieu!

Please review.

Also, there is now a poll on my profile. I'll appreciate it if you go and vote on it.

-espeon16


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